Not being able to stand occasionally has its perks

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If it is not obvious by now, I don’t stand a lot. If I do, it’s only with major assistance and it usually hurts. It’s always interesting to go to a church service or some other event where people are asked to either stand or go to their knees and pray. I can’t do either, if I ever got down on my knees it would literally take a crane to pick me up. When I am in an event like that, it’s the ultimate “look it me” moment, when every other person in the building is asked to stand. I am not opposed to look at me moments, I have this blog after all. That said, I often wonder what other people are thinking as they stand around me. If it’s a church service or graduation I imagine people think “man I would love to be him, how many more times are they going to ask us to stand?” At something like a rock concert the situation is similar to what you see in the comic. Most people just don’t care. Mostly because they are completely unaware that I’m sitting behind them. I can’t complain too much because I have had bad seats before and been pushed up to the front row because someone saw I was getting robbed, or at least perceived the situation that way. I’ve never had a cat standing on my head but I have been at a music event where I could see absolutely nothing. Then when I made it to the front row, I realized I hadn’t missed much.

I’m probably getting old, but front row is a really bad place to be at a concert, I loved it when I was a kid, but as I age I value my hearing. I think that’s mostly because I live with my dad who can’t hear anything and doesn’t realize it, I don’t want to be that. As I have gotten older I have learned to get the best available accessible seats, even if they are  a few bucks more. I would like to have great seats at a Dave Matthews band concert. It’s fun to watch those guys play, I’ve been twice and wasn’t close enough either time to even begin to see their faces. I also have to give them credit, both of their shows that I have seen were played outdoors and at a very reasonable volume.

As for getting down on my knees in a church service, I truly believe that God has a sense of humor. It has to be pretty funny to see you almost people on their knees or standing multiple times for long periods, and then there’s this kid just sitting there enjoying his seat having a peaceful enjoyable service. That’s irony folks.


Be honest. Have you ever considered renting a wheelchair for an event that you knew you would have to stand for a while? I will gladly rent mine out for the very reasonable rate of $150 an hour. Wheelchairs ain’t cheap folks. Your feet will thank you later.

Thanks again to Evie for showing so accurately exactly what it’s like to be me.

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