Category Archives: Motivational

Perspective is like car keys it can be easy to lose and you have to look around to find it

jj-perspective-1

Sometimes I get stuck in my own brain. The pressures of daily life mount, people test my patience, and my chair becomes a prison. I can’t go where I want, do what I want, be who I want to be. Some days it can be absolutely overwhelming. The mental strain can literally take over my mind. It feels like no one understands and there’s no way things could possibly improve anytime soon.

Sometimes I get this attitude. I think we all do. I think it’s part of our selfish human nature. Inevitably though I will hear about someone who just found out they have terminal cancer, and only have three months to live, or I may see a homeless person on the street with holes in their shoes and nothing to eat.

I have learned that I don’t have to look very far to realize how much I’ve been given in life and how blessed that I truly am. Yes I have a wheelchair, but I’m not terminally ill. I have a warm place to sleep and plenty of food to eat. At the end of the day my struggles really aren’t that big of a deal. No matter what your circumstances are right now I’m almost certain that you can look around and find someone who has less to be thankful for than you. Take the time to look around the next time the pressures and stresses of life threaten to overtake you. Be thankful and adjust your perspective.

I am thankful for Evie and for her willingness to continue to work with me. I’m also thankful to all of you for reading. You make this blog worth doing. What are you thankful for?

Leave us a comment.

Supporting independent creators and artists just makes you feel good

You will be moved
You will be moved

Today’s Post is a special one. If you’ve been reading this blog for very long, you know that my friend evie built this site and does all of my comics. To be honest I couldn’t do anything that I do on the Internet without her. She is one of the most special and creative people I have ever met. I do everything I can to encourage her to create as much as possible. More often than not something spectacular comes out. Recently she wrote a novel in less than 10 days I kid you not. I read it as she was writing and was completely blown away. She recently made the novel available for sale on her website for $7.99. Let me tell you a little secret about  Evie. She absolutely refuses to promote herself. so today, I decided to do it for her. She’s out of town ,and has absolutely no idea I’m doing this,

The novel is called Raven’s Resurrection. It chronicles a very talented woman’s Journey after abuse dramatically changes her life, and the people she touches along the way. I’m not afraid to tell you that the novel made me cry, and I’m certain that if you take the time to read it it will move you as well.

I am extremely biased because it was written by someone who I am extremely fond of but I’m sure one thing, you will not be disappointed.

Evie has two novels and would love to begin a career as a novelist. Every time I speak to her she has another idea for a book. So today I wanted to take a little time to support her in that endeavor. You can buy the book for $7.99 right here or simply by clicking the cover at the top of this post. After purchase you can start reading it immediately. You will be motivated to do something good for someone else after reading. I guarantee it. Do me a favor and treat yourself and support Evie at same time.

GO GET IT

Happy Monday everybody

 

I talk because sometimes it’s all I can do

mouth

This one is pretty self explanatory. I never know how I’m going to feel from day to day. What I do know is that no matter what else is going on with my mind or body, my mouth will work. My speech may be slightly slurred because of other things going on inside or around me. but I can always speak. Sometimes slurred speech is a major benefit when I am on a stage and a crowd is expecting me to be funny.

We all got issues but all of us also have something we can fall back on when nothing else is working. In my case, it happens to be my mouth. Anyone who has known me very long probably have thought that I have talked to much at one point or another.

Now they know why….

What do you fall back on?

Have a great week everybody

As always thanks to Evie for working magic. I’d be lost without her.

All things are possible but are you willing to try?

possible

I’ve never actually been parasailing but with a little research, I’m sure it can be done. A little research on Google told me that disabled surfing is a thing as well. I don’t know how badly I want to do that, but it’s there. I have been skiing. Until I actually did it I wasn’t sure if that was possible but I do remember the instructor telling me that as long as someone had a pulse, it could be done, and I did. (Yes I fell just like everybody else but it was great fun).

Not actually me but you get the idea
Not actually me but you get the idea

In school I was told that I can do anything that I put my mind to until it sounded like a broken record. Turns out, it’s actually true. We all have limitations, but honestly I believe they are only there as a test we must be willing to take to do what we want. For most of us I think the toughest part is convincing ourselves to try something and being okay if we fail, I know it’s hard for me. I hate to fail and I hate to make mistakes, but it’s the only way to figure things out.

What have you always wanted to conquer if you can convince yourself to try? Let us know in the comments.

The image can be found right here

As always thanks to Evie for her artistic brilliance.

It’s a good thing I’m not high maintenance

jj-patience

Relying on people is just part of being in wheelchair. I’m very independent but there are just things I can’t do. I’m constantly learning new things everyday to help myself but I fear I will always need help. As long as that’s the case I will have to be patient with other people. I’ve never had to get my mom out of bed for help, my brother is a different story. He is  really hard to wake up. He is also extraordinarily busy. It doesn’t happen often anymore, but when he helps me out, I am very well taken care of but I have to be flexible and work around his schedule. Jane is employed by me, but even she is completely unavailable for three days out of the month. I’m not complaining it’s just a fact. My mother is always around, but is constantly working on something so I may not have the opportunity to go to the restroom the second of the urge hits me. Especially if my family has gone out for something.

I learned very early on that I needed to be careful about what I consumed every day especially if I was going to be on my own for a few hours on a given day. If I know I’m going to be alone from 6 to 10 on a Friday night, I’m very careful about what I drink during that time frame so I’m not dying to use the restroom if they come in 20 or 30 minutes late.

Same with food. I have started keeping snacks where I can reach them in case I get hungry, but if I want a meal I need to make sure I eat when other people are eating. It doesn’t go over well, when you come out after the food has been put away and everyone else is ready to relax. (yes I have done that more than I care to admit). I  normally go to bed around the time that everyone else in my house goes. That’s really inconvenient for me, but it’s also not right for me to keep someone else up because I am not ready to sleep. It gets frustrating yes, but as long as I need help getting in bed, it’s a concession I have to be willing to make.

I also have to be gracious about it. This is something that I struggle with because I am an adult and it’s hard not to feel that I deserve more flexibility in my life. However, I have to remember that the person asking if I can go to bed, (usually my dad) cannot be expected to revolve around me. I’m very lucky that there’s usually someone  available to talk to, even if I’m in bed( Evie and I usually have at least a text conversation every night about something).

I have to be patient and accommodating whether I want to be or not because the people who help me, their needs, are just as important as mine.

Patience seems to be in very short supply in today’s world.I think I’m a better man because I’ve had to learn it just to be able to function. I don’t get exactly what I want, the second I want it, all the time. My needs are met and learning to be patient with other people has made me a better person.

Are there areas in your life that you need to learn patience, especially with other people? Leave us a comment and let us know.

As always big thanks to Evie for all that you do for me.

My ego gets big and then I remember I can’t tie my own shoes

jj-humble

I have never lacked self-confidence. I have spent more hours in my life making plans to be great then I care to admit. World class speaker, a comedian who can fill a stadium, Rock star. You name it, I’ve probably dreamed it. I often think that God gave me cerebral palsy because it was the only way he could thing to keep me in check. If I were able I will be unstoppable. I have a dream everyday, but I also have some unpredictable side effect of cerebral palsy to keep me on earth. Muscle spasms, physical inadequacies or challenges are always there and they don’t play nice.

There’s nothing more humbling in life then realizing you need someone’s help to get to the restroom. It’s a constant reminder that maybe I’m not such a big deal.

I’m not writing this post didn’t complain about all of my issues. I actually think to make the most out of life, you have to be humble. My mom used to say when I was younger, that is my head were any bigger, I would have trouble getting through a door, she doesn’t say things like that much anymore. I think most of the things that keep me humble now, were not issues for me when I was 20. I’ve also gotten smarter and learned to listen to the good people in my life more often. Sometimes I’ll listen and decide to do things my own way anyway, but being humble enough and willing to listen gives me more options and potential for less mistakes. I don’t know about you guys, but I’m old enough now to know the fewer mistakes I can make the better. Having cerebral palsy always reminds me that the most important thing in life is people because I will always need them to survive. I get frustrated often because I need so much help, but I hope in the long run that being humble, and having respect in everything that I do, will lead to a full and prosperous life that I can be proud of when it’s over.

What keeps you humble in your life?

Thanks to Evie for helping me to do so much everyday, including today’s comic.

Would you like some fun with that?

jj-drivethrough

When I was in college and on the radio in the mornings, I actually went through a McDonald’s drive-through in my wheelchair. One of cohosts on the show actually walked beside me to see the whole thing unfold, while talking to the listeners on a cell phone. That was maybe the most fun I ever had on the morning show.

The McDonald’s employees weren’t happy with me. I actually think I might have been banned from there for about six months. I had a car, it was just parked down the block. We just wanted to see what what happened. No real reason for doing it other than the fact that it was entertaining. So what’s my point with this post? Have fun, put yourself out there and see what happens. This was not the only crazy thing I did on the radio. I dressed up as Cupid for Valentine’s Day one year(that’s a whole other story) my reason for doing all that was because it was fun. My cohosts and my bosses were initially worried that I might be offended by putting myself in those types of situations where my wheelchair was the focus. I wasn’t. I had a blast and I would do it all again. I haven’t had nearly as much fun since I got out of school. I have several really enjoyable projects on the horizon that I will tell you about later, that may remedy that situation. Life is what you make it stand out and enjoy it.

What’s the craziest thing you have ever done just for fun?

Evie doesn’t even blink when I tell her the stories anymore. I think she’s becoming desensitized to my nuttiness. Best Vice president ever. Did I mention that she has a new website? Go check it out.

Being different is a gift use it

jj-different

I’m different. There’s no way to hide it or disguise it. I Also can’t change it. Every so often I think about what I miss out on because I’m different. Not being able to play sports, drive a car, go to bed when I choose, or 1 million other things that normal people take for granted every day. Most of the time however, I really like being me. I have some advantages that most of you never will. I got my education paid for because I have cerebral palsy. No student loan debt for this guy. Living with my parents seems like a real drag, but it has allowed me to save money and given me time to formulate my plan for taking over the world. I’ve never had a real job. This makes finances unpredictable sometimes, but it also means that my time is my own. I don’t answer to anyone. I’m single and I get lonely sometimes. I used to think I wanted a wife and family, but as I get older I’m starting to understand that unlike most people I’m in control of my own destiny.

When I come up with the million dollar idea that finally pans out, my life will be my own. I’m free to follow my dreams and be who I want to be. I am not there yet mind you, I have to remind myself on a daily basis that there is a plan and my time is coming. One thing that my freedom allows me to is to work with a person like Evie. I don’t know if you can tell or not from the way that I write, but Evie and I truly enjoy working together. We have some ideas that I won’t go into here, because we are not ready to unleash them on the world just yet, but we wouldn’t even have the ability to dream the way we do if we had “normal lives” I love cartoons and comic books and video games. I love to be creative. I love to give to people, sometimes I buy someone a gift on a random day just because I can. I get to act different because I am different. My life and circumstances will never be normal. At this point, I think I would be disappointed with normal. I sort of see myself as Bruce Wayne, (yes I know I haven’t made the money yet, but I will totally have a Batcave under my house).

I have to be honest and say that I didn’t have this attitude about being different until fairly recently. For most of my life, I have wanted the things that most people have. Recently I realized I can have things and freedom that most people only dream of, because my life is different. I have to tell you that being aware of the fact that my life is different and because of that I can be different is very empowering. When I was in high school I remember teachers and guidance counselors saying things like ” you can be anything you want to be” if there are any kids out there reading this, I’m here to tell you that it’s actually true. I’m not quite where I want to be yet, but I still have time to get there because my life is my own. Being different allows you to make your own rules. If I had realized that in my teens, there’s no telling what I could have accomplished. Life can be whatever we want it to be. We have all been given the ability to choose our own path, and spend our lives in the way we see fit.

If you haven’t lived your life your way, you can start today. There is still time.

 

How will you be different? What will you do?

Thanks to Evie for helping me share my crazy different life with you and for being my vice president in my efforts to take over the world.

If you like what we’re doing here, you can support our work by sharing this blog or by donating using the PayPal button on the right side of the page, your support is greatly appreciated.

 

If clothes are necessary why can’t they be easier to put on?

jj-gettingdressed

I need a lot of help getting dressed. I can put on her shirt if I need to. Tt may take a half-hour, but I can get it done. I can take a shirt off like a champ. Again, it takes a bit of time but not near as much as putting a shirt on. Pants are a different story. Again, I can get them off if I have to(ladies there is probably a joke in there somewhere about no man that God ever made having a problem taking his clothes off) I really   hate to admit, but taking them off is much easier,(and more fun then putting them on. Same deal with shoes, I can catch my shoe on the edge of the foot rest on my chair and get it off. If you have little children you may have to help them get dressed, but they have no problems taking their clothes off. Then they will certainly need help tying their shoes, but you need a GPS locator to keep track of them in public. I don’t wear slip on shoes for that exact reason, they come off too easily. Think of me in that way, the only difference between me and them is that I’m 37 with facial hair.

Getting dressed every day is something that I struggle with mentally. I have the brain and body of an adult, but it works so poorly that I have to have help dressing just like a young child. That’s tough to deal with. What tougher, is that I’ve had physical therapists my entire life, and none of them have never found an easy way for me to help myself. It seems like I always have someplace to be or is there some sort of time crunch, so taking an entire day to try and figure out how best to dress myself has never been an option. Not to mention taking several months to actually get good at it. My family helps me everyday with everything that I need. They have trouble watching me try to learn how to do something simple like put on pants. After some time passes, I often hear “just let me help you”

I’ve never even seen a good way to put on pants for someone in my situation I know people must do it, but given my physical shortcomings, I have never really figured it out.  I feel like I need some futuristic device from a science fiction TV show, that I can roll my chair into and get help dressing while a pleasing female voice helps me decide exactly what I want to wear. I have to admit I don’t work nearly hard enough at trying to figure this stuff out. My closet and clothes are not easily accessible to me, I’m always going somewhere, and time is always a factor.

I have been known to put my head through the armhole of a T shirt so not even that is an exact science. All of that said, let me tell you a little secret, all of the things I mentioned above are excuses. We all use them. You may not have trouble getting dressed, but I bet you have trouble getting motivated to work out, or eat healthy, or make better use of your time(I’m struggling with that right now) the key to all of those things that are tough is just to do it. Decide for yourself that you’re going to work on it. I may never be able to completely dress myself, but I know I can do more than I’m doing now. If I ever get a TV show I wonder if I can get a cheerleader or two to cheer me on as I try and solve the mystery of putting on pants. Now that’s entertainment.

So what do you struggle with? Are you willing to do the work to improve yourself? Even if you never reach your ultimate goal?

I’m really starting to wonder if Evie have cameras in my house… Yet another example of awesome artwork. Thank you

Doubt me I dare you

jj-brain

I’m going to admit something. When I was little I used to drool…. A lot. As an adult I’ll admit that it happens even now, if I get excited. I hear you saying to yourself “I’m in a fully functional adult and I have issues with drooling somedays. it happens to everybody, it doesn’t mean he’s not smart.” This is true, but add in the fact that I have somewhat slurred speech, limited motor skills, and I sit in a wheelchair. Most people think I’m lucky just to be alive. At first glance, I guess I can’t really blame them. Everybody says don’t judge a book by it’s cover but we all do it. I see a handicapped person on the street, and my first thought is “man that’s got to suck” and then I roll past a mirror and remember I am in the same boat. I think it’s human nature. The difference with me is,  when I see That person on the street I never doubt their mental capacity not for a second.

I don’t live in their shoes and I have no idea what they are capable of. If anything, when I see someone on the street like me, I wonder if they are living up to their potential, most probably aren’t, I’m not even sure I am.

I don’t mind when someone who doesn’t know me doubts my mental ability because it’s fun to prove them wrong, and most time I do. The best part is the looks on their faces when someone walks up and speaks to me like two years old, and 15 minutes later, I’m fixing their computer problems.

My family never doubts me mentally, they can’t. They live with me, and fully understand how my mind works. Where they sometimes struggle, is in their ability to understand how exactly I’m going to get something done. My absolute favorite example of this was my first day of college. My mother dropped me off, and insisted on following me to class. When I said no, her response was” how are you going to get your books out? How will you get notes? How will you get lunch? What if you need to use the restroom?” So she sat in my first class. When the class was over, I didn’t know the answer to any of her questions. I simply looked at her and said “I don’t know but I will figure it out, I love you but you have to go”

My dad has the same problem when I’m working on something new. I call him Mr. what if. He has a zillion what if questions. It took me a while to understand why my family reacted to me in this way. I finally understood that they have faith in me. They just don’t want me to fail or be disappointed. It’s frustrating sometimes that I have to continually prove myself especially to my family. As I get older I’m learning that surprising people every day just means I’m continually getting better and pushing myself. If I just sat in a corner and drooled, like most people expect, I might have a less stressful life but I’m pretty sure I’d be bored out of my mind.

Do people underestimate you, and do you work to prove them wrong?

Thanks into Evie for another fabulous piece of art